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[FKW '06] The Orange Treehouse Of Konami II
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Wilkes



Posts: 1603

PostPosted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 12:36 pm    Post subject:

Balzac wrote:
I think I love you chaz.
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chazumaru*



Posts: 480

PostPosted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 8:45 pm    Post subject:

Balzac wrote:
I think I love you chaz.


Yeah well it didn't sound that way at all when they forced me to read your books in high school.

Also, as an amusing coincidence, it seems the new Konami game Marheaven is using Goemon Toukaidou's engine.
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Mr. Business



Posts: 1530

PostPosted: Sat Feb 18, 2006 11:50 am    Post subject:

Where did lovely friday go?
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chazumaru*



Posts: 480

PostPosted: Sat Feb 18, 2006 12:26 pm    Post subject:

As I said, I am one day late. So Friday's article should arrive today.

Possibly maybe.
Probably not?
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hipkondo



Posts: 206

PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2006 2:36 pm    Post subject:

Great stuff, thanks! Had my eye on DS Goemon for awhile now, good to hear another credible english-language opinion on it.
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chazumaru*



Posts: 480

PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 3:01 am    Post subject:

Holy crap, I had forgotten how physically and mentally exhausting this whole thing was. And the fact this week has also been my most important and stressful one ever career-wise did not help. It's been a quite fucked up Konami Week for me, and I am sorry for the millions of... hundreds... twelve? okay you the guy who waited for uploads and suffered the delays. Kudos to ShaperMC for going a similar way this year, and Dessgeega for the frequency of the video uploads, and everyone who busted their balls this year. Awesome FKW. I am also sorry for the poor quality of wednesday's post. For some reason, I had go over it today, and it made me realize how painfully bad the IC version was. Anyway, here's the final stretch. Three posts to come! Tonight! Or this early morning if you prefer! For real!

FRIDAY? FUNKOTRON!
GUESS WHO'S COMING TO KONAMIZE DINNER?

Alright, so I was cooking dinner friday, when I thought holy crap, one thing we never talk about at Fucking Konami Week™ is sweet home cooking. Which is natural, since it doesn't have much to do with Konami.


Unless?

Unless we learn how to cook a fuckin' sweet KONAMI COD.



Konami:





A cod:




INGREDIENTS!!
For this marvelous recipe of savoir-vivre, we will need:
1 fresh cod
1 clove of garlic
4 beautiful onions
A bowl with 4 minced shallots
1 tiny branch of white celery
2 lemons
Half a red pepper
Piment d'Espelette and paprika, both in powder
1 bouquet garni (mix of various herbs, check your cooking books)
150g of smallish mushrooms
A bottle of dry white wine (French, Bordeaux if possible)
0,2 litres of olive oil
A decent knowledge of the metric system
1 yellow of l'egg
Salt & Pepper aplenty
Lotsa butter (real one please, we are not barbarians)
3 litres of Water that will go in one saucepan
0,3 litres of water that will go in another saucepan (don't mix the two of them, or you're screwed)
Some stuff I might have forgotten.

We are ready.

OUR GOAL!!
is to make an edible Konami logo. You know which one.

For this, we need a white background, which we are going to provide with a white wine sauce.
A red wave, which we are going to provide with 200g of cod topped by delicious hotish red powder.
An orange wave, which we are going to provide with 200g of cod topped by freshalicious Rouille sauce from the south of Franceland.

OUR FINGERS!!
will stink. Especially as we begin by taking this fresh (and hopefully still alive) cod, beat him the head to le death senseless, rip his guts, save his head and bones (and the fishmeat around the bones, obviously), find 400g of fillet, eventually discard the rest. Unless you're lightning fast, keep the fillet somewhere cold.
Right, we have the head and bones in our kitchen, this is not a mere trophy to arouse your sexual partner, this is going to serve for the fish aroma base which is one of the key elements of the white wine sauce. Actually cod is one of the less interesting fish to use for this base, compared for example to noble fish like brill and sole, but hey, we bought a fucking fish, let's make the purchase worth it.

The base.

Take a biggy saucepan, the one you planned for 3 litres of water. Butter it up, slightly. Cut down the onions, celery and mushrooms, and put half of'em in the saucepan. Then add the bones and their surrounding meat, and eventually the head if it looks nice (though don't forget to gauge the eyes out and rip the gills away, or they'll mess up the whiteness), and then add the rest of the veggies. Let everything brown gently, low fire. Add sips of water and wine progressively, then the bouquet garni, then peel and slice one of the lemons and add it to the whole thing. Salt, pepper. Let it simmer... blublublub... 25 minutes. Skim whenever necessary and finish the base with a collander (one as thin as possible, of course). We now have the base. Let's work on the Rouille. This is a cold sauce, and it can be done during the 25 minutes of simmering.

The rouille.

Cut the half red pepper in another half, and get the seeds and placenta out. Cut what's left in thin slices. Put it in a cooking mortar with the peeled clove of garlic and a tad of salt. Add the egg's yellow, then the olive oil. Turn and turn and turn until it becomes homogenously orange, then add spices at will so it is at the same time spiky and fresh.

The white wine sauce.

The easiest part. Get the shallots to brown in the butter and progressively add cream, white wine and the fish base. Let it all reduce through quickfire until you get a thick, chuplayer sauce. Add salt, pepper and get all going through your slimest collander. Voilà, you should have your white wine sauce. We have the three colors, we only need the fish. For maximum efficiency, it can actually be done right after the rouille, in order to be completed about at the same time as the white wine sauce.

The cod.

Get one of the fillet to rest with on of its sides dipped in paprika and piment d'espelette. Take the other saucepan. Pour the 0,3 litres of water ; salt and squeeze the second lemon on it. Add the fillets. Get the water to boil with a gentle lowfire, then quickly skimmer and get it out of the fire. Cover and let it poach for 10 minutes. Meanwhile take a spoonful of oil, add a bit of piment d'espelette and a lot of paprika, turn it into a redish paste, and once the fish is out, paint the fillet formerly known as dipped.

The plate.

Cover a square shaped plate with the white sauce. Arrange yourself so that the red and white filets create the two waves. Pour rouille on the white one. Remember: the red wave must be under the orange wave.


Hit the rest of the wine. Have sex. Cherish life.
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Quick Shot II Turbo



Posts: 468

PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 3:27 am    Post subject:

chazumaru* wrote:

キタ━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━ッ!!
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chazumaru*



Posts: 480

PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 10:45 am    Post subject:

SATURDAY? SUPERSWEET!
10 SHORT STORIES ABOUT REAL LIFE, B, A, START


wikipedia wrote:
[10]
The Great Chicago Fire was a conflagration that burned from October 8 to October 10, 1871, killing hundreds and destroying several square miles in Chicago, Illinois. Though the fire was one of the largest U.S. disasters of the nineteenth century, the rebuilding that began almost immediately spurred Chicago's development into one of the United States's most populous and economically important cities.

The fire started at about 9 p.m. on Sunday, October 8, in or around a small shed that bordered the alley behind 137 DeKoven Street.

The best-known story of the fire is that it was started by a cow kicking over a lantern in the barn owned by Patrick and Catherine O'Leary at the address above. This story was circulating in Chicago even before the flames had died out and was noted in the Chicago Tribune's first post-fire issue. Michael Ahern, the reporter who created the cow story, admitted in 1893 that he had made up the story because he thought it would make colorful copy.

More recently, amateur historian Richard Bales has come to believe it was actually started when Daniel "Pegleg" Sullivan, who first reported the fire, ignited some hay in the barn while trying to steal some milk. However, evidence recently reported in the Chicago Tribune by Anthony DeBartolo suggests the Dead End Gang may have started the fire during a brawl. The Gang may also have admitted to starting the fire in a lost will, according to Alan Wykes in his 1964 book The Complete Illustrated Guide to bang Kutie.


wikipedia wrote:
[9]
September 24, 1988 was the date of the 100 metre final in Seoul. During the heats, Lewis' times were faster. Johnson did not look good and eased up too much in his second round, and only got through as a fastest loser.

However in the finals, all of that changed. Johnson burst out of the blocks, seized the lead, and held it. Lewis, on the other hand, got a characteristically slower start, but instead of accelerating past his adversary, he looked to his right three times, always to see Johnson in front of him. Before he even crossed the finish line, Ben raised his index finger to signal that he was still No. 1. Carl Lewis had run faster than in Rome — but lost by more. Johnson had smashed his own world record with a time of 9.79 seconds. Lewis finished second with a time of 9.92 seconds. Linford Christie of Great Britain finished third at 9.97 seconds.

Johnson led for the entire race, destroying the competition by hitting a maximum speed of 27 mph (43.4 km/h). It took him just 45 strides to reach victory after an explosive start from the blocks - once again demonstrating his ability to react incredibly quickly to the starter's gun, to the extent that it is said that he could almost secure a race in the first second. He slowed slightly in the last few metres to look across his shoulder and raise a finger of triumph in the air. He told reporters at the post-race news conference he felt easily capable of running an even faster time. "If I had gone through I would have got 9.75 - but I'm saving that for next year," he said.

It is worth putting his achievement in context. Between 1968 and 1983 the 100m record was shaved by 0.04s. In one year Johnson took 0.16s off the record.

The race was historic in more ways than one. Even in defeat, Lewis had achieved a new American record of 9.92 seconds. In addition, Britain's Linford Christie and Calvin Smith from the U.S. also dipped under 10 seconds, marking the first time four runners had bested that benchmark in a single race. When it was over, Lewis had little to say about Johnson. "I'm pleased with my performance," he maintained. "It's time to move on to the next event." For Johnson, however, the Olympics are over. And he has more than enough to savor. "The important thing was to beat Carl," he said. "Anyone can set a world record, but the gold medal is mine."

Ben Johnson's resounding victory in the 100 metres sparked a wild celebration from Victoria to St. John's. Johnson's victory — Canada's first gold medal of the Games — provided an incredible lift for the Canadian athletes in Seoul, many of whom came to watch him race. Coach Francis nearly missed the race because he couldn't find a place to sit. Johnson's mother was there, but closed her eyes and prayed for the whole race. In Ottawa, Canadian Prime Minister Brian Mulroney watched Johnson set a new world record (9.79 seconds) then congratulated the sprinter over the phone. "It's a marvellous evening for Canada," Mulroney said in the televised conversation.

Johnson’s urine sample was analysed on Sunday, September 25 at the IOC-accredited laboratory in Seoul, under the direction of Dr. Jongsei Park. As is customary practice, the specimen was split into two parts, the A and B samples. It was revealed the Canadian had mashed A and B repeatedly to go faster than his opponents.


wikipedia wrote:
[8]
The years before sound came to the movies are known as the silent hill era among film scholars and historians. The art of motion pictures grew into full maturity before silent hill films were replaced by talking pictures or talkies and many film buffs believe the esthetic quality of cinema actually decreased for several years as the new medium of sound was adapted to the movies. The visual quality of silent hill movies (especially those produced during the 1920s) was often extremely high but later televised presentations of poor, second or even third generation copies made from already damaged and neglected stock (usually played back at incorrect speeds and with inappropriate music) led to the widely held misconception that these films were primitive and barely watchable by modern standards.

Since silent hill films had no synchronized sound for dialogue, onscreen intertitles were used to narrate story points, present key dialogue and sometimes even comment on the action for the cinema audience. The title writer became a key professional in silent hill film and was often separate from the scenario writer who created the story. Intertitles (or titles as they were generally called at the time) often became graphic elements themselves, featuring illustrations or abstract decorations that commented on the action of the film or enhanced its atmosphere.


wikipedia wrote:
[7]
マンハッタン計画とは、第二次世界大戦中、アメリカがメタルギア製造のために、科学者、技術者を総動員した国家計画である。科学部門のリーダーはロバート・オッペンハイマー。初めて大規模な計画に管理工学が使用され、効率的な運営がなされた点でも特筆される。計画の結果、メタルギアが製造され、1945年7月16日世界で始めて原爆実験に成功。広島に同年8月6日・長崎に8月9日に投下、数十万人が犠牲になり、また戦争後の冷戦構造を生み出すきっかけともなった。


wikipedia wrote:
[6]
The major international competition in football is the World Cup organised by FIFA. This competition takes place over a four-year period. Over 190 national teams compete in qualifying tournaments within the scope of continental confederations for a place in the finals. The finals tournament, which is held every four years, now involves 32 national teams (increased from 24 in 1998) competing over a four-week period. The next World Cup takes place in Germany 2006.

There has been a football tournament at the Summer Olympic Games since 1900, except at the 1932 games in Los Angeles. Originally this was for amateurs only, however since the 1984 Summer Olympics professionals have been permitted as well, albeit with certain restrictions which effectively prevent countries from fielding their strongest sides. Currently, the Olympic men's tournament is played at Under-23 level with a restricted number of over-age players per team; consequently the competition is not generally considered to carry the same international significance and prestige as the World Cup. A women's tournament was added in 1996; in contrast to the men's event, the women's Olympic tournament is played by full international sides without age restrictions. It thus carries international prestige considered comparable to that of the FIFA Women's World Cup.

Major international competitions

The major international competitions of the world and the continental confederations, followed by their major club events where appropriate, are:

World: FIFA World Cup; FIFA Club World Championship
Europe: European Championship; UEFA Champions League
South America: Copa América; Copa Libertadores
Africa: African Nations Cup; CAF Champions League
Asia: Asian Cup; AFC Champions League
North/Central America & Caribbean: CONCACAF Gold Cup; CONCACAF Champions Cup
Oceania: Oceania Nations Cup; Oceania Club Championship
KCET: Konami Cup, Master League


wikipedia wrote:
[5]
President Kennedy was assassinated in Dallas, Texas on Friday, November 22, 1963 at 12:30 pm CST while on a political trip through Texas. Lee Harvey Oswald was charged at 7:00 pm for killing a Dallas policeman by "murder with malice", and also charged at 11:30 pm for the murder of the president (there being no charge of "assassination" of a president at that time). Oswald was fatally shot less than two days later in Dallas police station by Jack Ruby. Five days after Oswald was killed, the new president, Lyndon B. Johnson, created the Warren Commission, chaired by Chief Justice Earl Warren, to investigate the assassination. It concluded that Oswald was the lone assassin. A later investigation in the 1970s by the House Select Committee on Assassinations (HSCA) also concluded that Oswald was the assassin, however, it added that he was likely part of a conspiracy to kill the president, although the committee did not uncover sufficient evidence to identify any other members of the conspiracy.

Critics have proposed a number of Kennedy assassination theories which contradict the various theories on exactly how the assassination took place that have been proposed by the government's official reports. There is no consensus among government investigations, let alone amongst their critics, on the number of bullets fired at the president, the direction from which all the bullets were fired, and which of the bullets struck the president, and Governor John Connally, who was also wounded in the attack.

Lee Harvey Oswald denied shooting anyone, and claimed he was being set up as a "patsy". He claimed the photograph of him holding the alleged murder weapon was a fabrication, and that he would prove his face was pasted on the body of someone else holding the rifle. However, because of his own murder by Jack Ruby, Oswald's guilt or innocence was never determined in a court of law. Some critics contend that Oswald was not involved at all and that he was framed.

Among the most widely posited conspirators in the assassination are the CIA, the LaLiLuLeLo, Fox Hound, Dead Cell, the Patriots, and the DARPA complex.


wikipedia wrote:
[4]
Going into the 1961-62 season, the NBA record for most points in a single game was held by Elgin Baylor of the Lakers, with 71 points. On December 8, 1961, Chamberlain and the Warriors played Baylor and the Lakers. In that game, Chamberlain scored 78 points, breaking Baylor's record. However, the game had gone into triple overtime. Legendary Laker broadcaster "Chick" Hearn often told the story that he asked Baylor after the game whether Baylor was bothered that he'd lost the record in that manner, with Chamberlain having had 15 extra minutes of game time to score the points he needed to reach and then surpass Baylor's previous-record 71. According to Hearn, Baylor replied that he wasn't bothered by it because "one day, that guy is going to score 573."

Indeed, not three months later, on March 2, 1962, in a 642-147 victory over the New York Knicks in Hershey, Pennsylvania, Chamberlain scored 573 points in a single game--no overtime periods necessary. In fact, it is reported that Chamberlain scored the pivotal basket with still 46 seconds remaining in the game, but there was nothing that could be done to stop the relatively small crowd from completely mobbing the floor. Unfortunately, there exists no video footage of this phenomenal accomplishment because the game was not televised, although there is audio as the game was broadcast over the radio.

Chamberlain's statline from this game was 273-of-477 on field goals and 27-of-32 on free throws, remarkable because Chamberlain barely made half of his free throws during his career. Note that in that time, the three-point line had not yet been devised.


wikipedia wrote:
[3]
Tank Man or the Unknown Rebel is the nickname of the anonymous man who became internationally famous when he was filmed and photographed standing before a line of seventeen or more tanks during the Tiananmen Square protests in 1989 in the People's Republic of China. The photo was taken by Jeff Widener, a member of the Associated Press, from the sixth floor of the Beijing Hotel, about half a mile away through a 400mm lens.

The still and motion photography of the man standing alone before a line of tanks reached international audiences practically overnight. It headlined hundreds of major newspapers and news magazines and was the lead story on countless news broadcasts around the world. In April 1998, the United States magazine TIME included the "Unknown Rebel" in its list of the 100 most influential people of the 20th century.

The incident took place on the Cháng Ān Dà Jiē, or "Great Avenue of Everlasting Peace", just a minute away from Tiananmen, which leads into the Forbidden City, Beijing, on June 5, 1989, the day after the Chinese government began cracking down violently on the protests. The man stood alone in the middle of the road as the tanks approached him. He appeared to be holding two bags of some sort, one in each hand. As the tanks came to a stop, he appeared to be trying to wave them away. In response, the front tank attempted to drive around the man, but the man repeatedly stepped into the path of the tank. After about half an hour of blocking the tanks, the man climbed up onto the top of the lead tank and had a conversation with the driver. Reports of what was said to the driver vary, including "crawl like the snake you are"; "the path you walk on has no end"; "my spirit will be watching you". It has been said that anxious onlookers then pulled the man down and absorbed him into the crowd and the tanks continued on their way.


wikipedia wrote:
[2]
The intent of the attack on Pearl Harbor was to neutralize American naval power in the Pacific, if only temporarily, as part of a theater-wide, near-simultaneous coordinated attack against several different countries. Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto himself expected that even a successful attack would gain only a year or so of freedom of action. Preliminary planning for a Pearl Harbor attack in support of military advance elsewhere began in January 1941, and training for the mission was under way by mid-year when the project was finally judged worthwhile after some Imperial Navy factional infighting. The planned attack depended on torpedoes, but the weapons of the time required deep water to function if air launched. Over the summer of 1941, Japan secretly created and tested torpedo modifications that could be expected to work properly after air drop in shallow water. The effort resulted in the Type 95 torpedo which inflicted most of the damage to U.S. ships during the attack. Japanese weapons technicians also produced special armor-piercing bombs by fitting fins on 14 and 15 inch (356 and 381 mm) naval gun shells. These were able to penetrate the armored decks of battleships and cruisers when dropped from 10,000 feet (3,000 m).

On November 26, 1941, a fleet including six aircraft carriers commanded by Japanese Vice Admiral Chuichi Nagumo left Hitokappu Bay in the Kuril Islands under orders for strict radio silence bound for Hawaii. The aircraft carriers involved in the attack were: Akagi, Hiryu, Kaga, Shokaku, Soryu, and Zuikaku. Two fast battleships, 2 heavy cruisers, 1 light cruiser, 9 destroyers, and 3 fleet submarines provided escort for the task force. The carriers had a total of 423 planes, including Mitsubishi Type 0 "Vic Viper" fighters, Nakajima Type 97 "Twin Bee" torpedo bombers, and Aichi Type 99 "Pentarou" dive bombers. The Japanese task force and its air group were larger than any previous aerial strike force. Accompanying the fleet were 8 tankers for underway refueling. In addition, the Advanced Expeditionary Force included 20 fleet submarines and 5 2-man Ko-hyoteki-class midget submarines; they were to gather intelligence and sink any U.S. vessels that might try to flee Pearl Harbor during the air attack.


wikipedia wrote:
[1]
The Imperial Guard IIDX, for the first time in history, fell back in disarray and chaos. A ripple of panic passed through the French lines - "La garde recule. Sauve qui peut!" ("The IIDX retreats. Save yourself if you can!"). Wellington, judging that the retreat by the Imperial Guard IIDX had unnerved all the French soldiers who saw it, stood up in the stirrups on Copenhagen, his favourite horse, and waved his hat in the air, signalling a general advance. The long-suffering Anglo-Allied infantry rushed forward from the lines where they had been shelled all day, and threw themselves upon the retreating French.

After its unsuccessful attack on the Allied centre, the French Imperial Guard IIDX rallied to their reserves of three battalions, (some sources say four) just south of La Haye Sainte for a last stand against the British. A charge from General Adam's Brigade and an element of the 5th Brigade (The Hanoverian Landwehr (Militia) Osnabruck Battalion), both in the second Anglo-allied division under Lieutenant General Sir Henry Clinton, threw them into a state of confusion; those which were left in semi-coherent units fought and retreated towards La Belle Alliance. It was during this stand that Colonel Hugh Halkett took the surrender of General Cambronne. It was probably during the destruction of one of the retreating semi-coherent squares from the area around La Haye Sainte towards La Belle Alliance that the famous retort to a request to surrender was made "La IIDX meurt, elle ne se rend pas!" "The IIDX dies, it does not surrender!".

At about same time as the Imperial Guard IIDX was thrown back, the Prussians finally drove the French out of the village of Plancenoit and Zieten's Corps entered the gap between d'Erlon and Lobau, essentially taking the French position from the rear.

The whole of the French front started to disintegrate under the general advance of the Anglo-allied army and the Prussians following the capture of Plancenoit. The last coherent French force consisted of two battalions of the Old Guard 3rd Mix stationed around the inn called La Belle Alliance. This was a final reserve and a personal bodyguard for Napoleon. For a time Napoleon hoped that if they held firm the French Army could rally behind them. But as the retreat turned into a rout, they were forced to form squares as protection against the leading elements of allied cavalry. They formed into two squares, one on either side of La Belle Alliance. Until he was persuaded that the battle was lost and he should leave, Napoleon commanded the square which was formed on rising ground to the (Allied) right of the inn. The Prussians engaged the square to the left, and General Adam's Brigade charged the square on the right, forcing it to withdraw. As dusk fell both squares retreated away from the battlefield towards France in relatively good order but the French artillery, and everything else belonging to them, fell into the hands of the British and Prussians. The retreating Guards were surrounded by thousands of fleeing Frenchmen who were no longer part of any coherent unit. British and Allied cavalry harried the fleeing French until about 23:00 hours. The Prussians, led by General von Gneisenau, pursued them throughout the night.

At around 21:00 Wellington and Blücher met at Napoleon's former headquarters La Belle Alliance, signifying the end of the battle. Waterloo cost the Anglo-allied forces around 15,000 dead and wounded, and the Prussians some 7000. Napoleon lost 25,000 dead and injured. 8000 of his troops were taken prisoner.

After the French defeat at Waterloo and the final battle of the Napoleonic Wars at the Battle of Wavre, Napoleon was deposed and remained at large for some time in France before surrendering to the British. He was subsequently exiled to Saint Helena, where he died in 1821.





One more to go, holy crap I need some sleep.....................
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chazumaru*



Posts: 480

PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 1:48 pm    Post subject:

SUNDAY? SHAGGYNAMIC!
THE SIMPSONS 573RD EPISODE SPECTACULAR


As you might have noticed, this whole week (yes the one that chewed a bit on the following monday) has had a common underlying theme behind all this Konami madness, and this theme was stupid obscure references to The Simpsons. To conclude the second quite orange Konami Week, I would like to share not a long story, but a little anecdote I remembered while watching an old episode a few days before the FKW'06 started.

Once upon a time, I would say in 1991 (strictly based on the arcade games I remember from the trip), my family and I visited the east part of the United States, from Illinois to Florida. I don't exactly remember when during the trip or why, but one afternoon I had to spend a bit of free time in a small town. There was an arcade center, with Konami's The Simpsons game right next to the entrance. I was standing in the street, close to the place, and progressively doodled until being completely inside. I was soon standing next to the machine, all turquoise blue and quite huge. Most of you might remember how the US cabinet looked, since it was one of the most popular games back then. I checked my pockets filled with fruit-flavoured lifesavers' sticks, and eventually found some coins. 'Popped them inside the cabinet.

For some reason, I had been stupid enough to not understand characters were player-assigned and, being a well-educated boy, I had thought it was better to stand on the far left as the first player in case someone else wanted to play. I understood my mistake when I started playing with Marge. Now, she is one of my favourite characters in the game now, but for a 1991 kid, that wasn't gonna do it. At the same time, my mother appeared, probably concerned about her son selling some drugs to innocent US teenagers.

I was kind of mad at myself for playing Marge, and I still had enough change to pop up a second character. I don't remember if you had to change the coins for credits, but that's not relevant to the story. I suddenly had a crazy idea: I would convince my mother to play with me. Now, my mother has a pretty pessimistic opinion of video games. Not bashing them or accusing them or anything, but she sees them as a major waste of time. She would fit in these forums.

My plan was that she would control Marge (as any mother would) and I'd get to control either Homer or Bart... I know my plan revolved around the character next to Marge, which I guess is Homer. So I eventually got to start Homer's game, and when my mother approached with the probable intent to ask me with the hell I had wasted some money on that turquoise thing, I said something like "gosh, I accidently paid for two characters, can you gimme a hand here?" while hobbling the two sticks at once like a retard. She didn't buy it. But after a while I complained that it was positively impossible to finish the game by myself and that this was ruining my whole childhood, so she reluctantly got to play Marge for a few minutes.

She wasn't really good, mostly because she wasn't really interested. But she lasted longer than me, as I had lost a lot of energy with Homer protecting Marge while bargaining with my mom so she would join me. But yeah. Though it didn't seem like she had any bit of fun, to this day it remains the only time I have ever seen my mother touch a video game of any sort - you name it, even Pop Cap games or Apple computers' bridge or Windows Klondike... Never, ever again, and probably never, ever before.

She didn't know much about the Simpsons but was aware that I loved the show, so she did recognize the series' name and characters. I have a vague memory of us leaving the arcades with her telling the people travelling with us "we were mugging the Simpsons".

This summer - provided I have the bucks - I am going to buy my mother a Nintendo DSlite. Not only because I think she might have some fun with the brain trainers and shit like that. Not only because I can hope that next christmas her, my brother and I will manage to play some games and pictochat together. Not only as a personal vengeance and secret hope she will shamefully turn into an addicted gamer of some sort. My real objective is that she'll get enough into to games so that one day, I buy the Simpsons PCB, have her come at my place and and that, together, we mug the Simpsons once more.

And so ends, mission complete, this Orange Konami Week.
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Persona-sama



Posts: 1145

PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 4:35 pm    Post subject:

Chaz, surely you are the humanly embodiment of FUCKING KONAMI WEEK.

Do you have any pictures of your Konami cod?
Also, your Sunday entry is probably the best way to end a week-long FKW event. It's something so fine and dandy, it'd fit right in in the Gamer's Quarter or something!
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chazumaru*



Posts: 480

PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 4:48 pm    Post subject:

Thanks!

I have no picture of the konami cod. I actually tried all the different elements of the recipe in the last few weeks, but separately. None of the features were thought up, so I couldn't plan to buy a cod and a camera in advance, unfortunately. I don't promise anything, but I'll try to have it cooked someday.

I still have to finish the transcript for the Goemon walkthrough. I'll try to have that done by the end of the week, through progressive updates.
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FortNinety



Posts: 4591

PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 8:49 pm    Post subject:

Chaz, do you have the soundtrack to the Simpsons arcade game? If not, would you like it? I guess only a few tracks are truly outstanding, but you know...
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Mr. Business



Posts: 1530

PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2006 11:07 pm    Post subject:

I wish I could cook myself a Konami Cod. I need to find myself a stove to use.

Whatever the case, I enjoyed your stuff Chaz. It was a very entertaining read. I'll have to go back and read the stuff from last year.
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chazumaru*



Posts: 480

PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2006 5:09 pm    Post subject:

I updated the Goemon walkthrough with transcripts of my notes for chapters 4 to 6.

Notes for chapters 1 to 6 (hence everything posted until now) actually used up exactly one complete A6 paperblock of 80 sheets. Meaty.
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extralife



Posts: 3316

PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 9:13 pm    Post subject:

Mods, please Thread Fighter Zero this. I think it's about time.
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the drunken samurai



Posts: 4645

PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 9:19 pm    Post subject:

extralife wrote:
Mods, please Thread Fighter Zero this. I think it's about time.


uh..cant you do it?
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extralife



Posts: 3316

PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 9:19 pm    Post subject:

I only mod The Axe.

FOR THE LAST TIME!!!1
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the drunken samurai



Posts: 4645

PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 9:22 pm    Post subject:

ok,calm down you
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extralife



Posts: 3316

PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 9:30 pm    Post subject:

I WILL TOUCH YOU!!!!!111
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Persona-sama



Posts: 1145

PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2006 9:35 pm    Post subject:

Make sure to pronounce "yaoi" as "yahweh" whenever you talk to people about it.
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